


Larrikin Bullies Hopeless with Furbies

by trainwhistlesatnight



Category: Skulduggery Pleasant - Derek Landy
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Furbies, Gen, Hopeless nearly fistfights Larrikin because of his love of furbies, I would say this is crack but honestly this might as well be canon, Larrikin loves weird and odd things and I will take this headcanon to the grave, Silly, background Anton/Larrikin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:34:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25030093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trainwhistlesatnight/pseuds/trainwhistlesatnight
Summary: Larrikin loves oddities, pranks, and recently- furbies. The others.. Well, they have opnions.
Relationships: Larrikin/Anton Shudder
Comments: 5
Kudos: 15





	Larrikin Bullies Hopeless with Furbies

**Author's Note:**

> Long time no see! Come talk to me on twitter (@train_whistles) or tumblr (@train-whistles-at-night) :]!

For all that Larrikin was, and he was a lot, he was silly. Maybe it wasn't the first and foremost thing one would come to know about him, but it was up there. Larrikin loved to play jokes and pranks and make others laugh. Things weren't so dull, and didn't ache quite as much if people were laughing (and it wasn't at you).

  
Larrikin also loved oddities. Loved going to antique shops and picking out and holding all the little knick-knacks that would be gathered there. So the baby dolls were a bit scratched and the paint on them chipped and a few were missing limbs! They were dolls, baby dolls at that, and that just meant they needed some care and love. So there were things in there that were definitely haunted and gave people weird vibes, that just meant you treated it with extra respect. So there were photos of people long passed and games and puzzles missing pieces and he was sure the old statuettes and paintings stared at him as he looked around. That was fine, as long as he was respectful, and good to the things in there. Treat them as you want to be treated, as some would say.

  
Anyway, as previously stated, Larrikin enjoyed things that were a bit odd, or a lot odd. And now since you know the lengths of just a few of the odd things he liked, you can understand that when Larrikin discovered furbies (not in their original selling, but in the more recent rise in popularity again), that he decided immediately that he adored them.  
He bought a few of them, normal little furbies who beeped and made gibberish noises and loved them with his whole heart. Anton tolerated them, didn't mess with them much, but took to talking to them as well, just like Larrikin did, when he was alone in the room and cleaning. (He did not mention this to others, because he was fairly certain a good amount of people thought he was crazy for a lot of reasons already, and did not feel like adding 'talks to furbies when alone' to the list. Larrikin knew anyway.) Larrikin gave them each names (Guzman, Almond, and Spinach), and loved that they had little personalities.

  
The other Dead Men thought they were.. Interesting. And had varying reactions to them. Skulduggery took one look and decided he hated them, and they were annoying (Larrikin pouted at him for being mean for 3 days straight). They weirded Ravel out, so he tried not to be around them much. Hopeless had neutral feelings towards them. Anton mainly dealt with them for Larrikin's sake, with the rule that the batteries had to be taken out before bed. Saracen, Ghastly, and Dexter all found them sorta neat, and Ghastly even made little clothes for them. 

  
So really, everything was fine.

  
Until he discovered the trend of 'long furbies', decided he loved that as well, and would make one.

  
He had Ghastly give him a refresher on how to sew furred fabric together seamlessly (without telling him why he wanted to know this, but Ghastly, being used to Larrikin just wanting to know things sometimes, taught him without asking too many questions). Bought another furby, gave her the beautiful name of Cordelia, and set to work. 

  
No less than a week later was she done- beautiful light brown and white patterned, stuffed full but still loose enough to move like a worm, and attached with the mechanics in half (of course with the head and eyes and ears at the top, and the little feet at the bottom). Larrikin adored her. No one but Anton knew about her.

  
And as mentioned before, Larrikin loved to play pranks, and with his chosen discipline being teleportation, prank-playing was just that much easier.

  
So, in the coming weeks before Cordelia was originally sent off to Larrikin after being bought, he decided he would make Hopeless actually have an opinion on them (note that Hopeless _had been_ neutral on them). So one day, when Hopeless had stepped outside to tend to their garden, Larrikin popped in, left one of his original three furbies on their kitchen counter (it was Almond) and popped out. It took 45 minutes for Larrikin to get a text from Hopeless saying _' **Come get ur thing you left here.'**_

  
Larrikin played innocent, _' **My jacket?'**_

  
**_'No, ur thing that you really like, furry or whatever. U did also leave your jacket, tho.'_ **

  
_**'Oooo my FURBY, ok!'**_ And he grinned, and collected both Almond and his jacket, plan in motion, and happy as could be.

  
So when two days later, Spinach appeared, balanced precariously on top of the TV while Hopeless had gone to the restroom, it frightened them a bit. Less because it was a furby and on top of their TV, but more because it happened to have the batteries in, letting out one of it's little robotic squawks of 'beebo, doodah!' flapped it's ears, and fell off the TV with a huge clatter that would startle anyone. Hopeless picked it up by one of it's ears, and called Larrikin.

  
"Hellooo~?" Larrikin answered. Hopeless was in no mood for games, their heart still beating a mile a minute.

  
"Come get your fucking furby-thing."

  
"I thought I had them all here? Oh, guess I don't!" And popped right over, the phone crackling loudly enough to make Hopeless have to pull it away from their ear as it essentially disappeared and reappeared in reality again. They ended the phone call, and held out the furby (still being held onto by it's ear.) Larrikin gasped over-dramatically and took it in his arms, practically cradling it like an infant. "Don't hold them like that, it'd hurt!"

  
Hopeless didn't look impressed, crossing their arms and looking at the little creature. "It's a plastic little," they flapped their hand, "robot. It doesn't feel, Lar." Larrikin shrugged, hmph-ing.

  
"Well still, it's mine and I'd appreciate if you didn't hold them like that." Hopeless shrugged and nodded.

  
"Alright, take it home, and stop leaving them here, I don't even know how they keep getting here because I never remember you bringing them." Larrikin nodded and shrugged.

  
"Guess you have other things on your mind, but, we'll be going now, say goodbye, Almond!" Larrikin said, making it flap one of it's ears in a wave goodbye, and disappeared. Hopeless merely sighed, and went back to watching TV.

  
A few days later, Guzman made his appearance, and got a whollop for it. Hopeless had taken a nap, telling those in the group-chat, in case they needed them. They got a few wishes for sweet dreams and a few 'see you later's and drifted off peacefully. Larrikin waited until he was sure they were asleep, popped in, Guzman in hand, and set him ever-so-gently on the bed beside Hopeless' head. He popped off, and waited.

  
Not ten minutes later, did Hopeless shuffle in their sleep, and Guzman noting the activity, turned on, letting out an excited robotic whoop. This scared Hopeless awake, who in their fear, yelped and punched the poor thing so hard it flew off off their bed and clattered onto the floor, ears wiggling and letting out another whoop. They angrily punched in Larrikin's number.

  
"Ye-"

  
" _ **LARRIKIN!**_ "

  
He immediately popped over, "yes?" He asked, grinning. Hopeless crawled out of bed, sheets still tangled around them, picked up the furby, and almost slammed it into Larrikin's hands. 

  
"I will _kill you_ if you do that again, that thing nearly gave me a heart attack!" Larrikin apologized, genuinely meaning it, and after a moments, they made up and Hopeless laid in their bed to attempt to finished their nap, and Guzman and Larrikin were home, safe and sound.

  
So there were no more furbies for a while, and things were good and quiet, and Cordelia was being sewn together with all the love and care Larrikin could muster. Soon, she was finished. Larrikin waited another week, and then, it was _time_.

  
Hopeless was going grocery shopping, and Larrikin knew he only had so much time to get Cordelia set up. "So, if Hopeless decides to kill me, I want Ghastly, Saracen and Dexter to have my furbies, and you to have my blanket collection and Skulduggery to have my marbles, since he's already lost his own." Larrikin told Anton as Anton got dressed, and Cordelia was wrapped around Larrikin's person. Anton hummed and nodded, giving Larrikin a kiss on the cheek and an only-slightly-hesitant pat to Cordelia's head, and Larrikin was off.

  
Hopeless had a very nice and comfy home, and a good amount of chairs, which was good, because there were, including themselves, eight Dead Men, and each one needed a seat. But the best seat, was Hopeless' own: a nice comfy armchair that could even recline with a footrest. And what a better waiting spot for a queen like Cordelia herself? Larrikin moved the footrest out, and set her down, carefully arranging her to face the front door, and not fall down. Once he was sure, he hurried down the hall and sat on Hopeless' bed, and waited.

  
And waited.

  
And just when he thought maybe Hopeless had already come home and he didn't get the reaction he wanted, he head the lock of the front door jiggle, and keys jangle, and finally, the door open.

  
Hopeless' bewildered and obviously frightened screech of, " ** _WHAT THE FUCK?!_** " could be heard quite clearly from well across the house. And Larrikin laughed so hard that he nearly fell off the bed, and his stomach hurt.

  
After that, Hopeless certainly had an opinion on furbies, and is was that they did _NOT_ like them, _ESPECIALLY_ long ones.

  
Though they _did_ commend Larrikin's dedication when they were sure they were still in this reality again and not ready to kill Larrikin with their own, bare hands.


End file.
